Street!Chalk Of Words Of words I put on paper for all the world to see I try to choose the ones that last eternally tears are always wet and blood is always red and sure as I'm here now someday I'll be dead so, I'd like to leave a mark of my own special kind a little book of words I felt and left behind of all life has taught me the good & the bad, the tears and the joy the happy & sad Each piece I sit to write is a part of my soul and putting it on paper is what makes me whole.

Lost Soul Place Behind these smiling eyes, and this smiling face is a dark and scary, lonley lost soul place Surrounded by the faces, so many people here but none of them know me, or the things that I fear I can be the queen of the plastic smile staying hidden from myself, hiding in denile crying all alone, wondering what's wrong with me smiling at the world, cause I don't want you to see I'm sitting in this darkness, I just can't see the light and I don't know if I can find the strength to fight skeletons in my closet, at least a graveyard full holding the door shut inside in case you try to pull the door open to see just what there is inside sugar coated heartache, I can't trust to confide with all this on my plate my tears could make a river but a plastic coated smiles is what I will deliver because.... behind these smiling eyes, of this smiling face is a dark and scary, lonley lost soul place. The Thief You lied my heart on a bed of nails bandages you did not make You watched me bleed with a grin of content of all you had the power to take My heart is battered and blue and it's all because of you but you sit there with your smirking grin of all that you have  taken in sin       Gaping Hole  I wish I could forget you Strip you from my mind why can’t my heart remember I left you behind? Why don’t I want to understand this wasn’t part of fate maybe it’s because you weren’t just to date I fell in love with open heart you saw into my soul you weren’t part of the plan to fill in this gaping hole so I ran from that which filled it and dug it deep again tried to cover traces with booze and drugs and then the hole was deep as ever at the bottom was my soul I shed these tears because you use to make me whole I know it’s all my fault cause I was too afraid to believe in something better than the choices that I made and now the choices I made are swallowing my soul cause I really wanted you to fill this gaping hole. Street~Chalk

Poetry...comes in many shapes &forms

No Strings Momentary bliss:Often miss: forever reminisce This sexual  lust is my every desire It's what turns this flame into a fire So, comfort me and cradle the flame 'Cause for a moment, it takes away the pain So let me up, let me breathe Just promise me now that you won't leave Call me a sinner, call me a liar 'Cause I'm feelin' it coming My every desire, for fire . . . so, please, baby Comfort me and cradle the flame 'Cause for a moment, it takes away the pain Don't smother my soul in misery Just stay for now, just let it be Call me a sinner, call me a liar 'Cause I'm feelin' it coming My inner desire for fire . . . please, baby Comfort me and cradle the flame 'Cause for a moment, it takes away the pain So, let me up, let me breathe Just promise me now that you won't leave

Forever Holding, Part of my Heart

We laughed out loud, even when there was a crowd, 

 we walked naked on the beach, 

in July sun
we shared a silence that was loud 
but turned a blind eye to what had just begun...
I turned you out, you dragged me in
who knew degrees, could go so low in sin
young sexy bodies... hotel rooms, in the yard
somehow you knew you held my wild card
What's become of you? What's become of me?
I think this was the first time I was free
romantic memoir's of our mutual lustful needs
some persuasion, no regret,
amazing times, I won't forget
especially how I cried myself to sleep ...
and... trust me dear there weren't any sheep
just the scar from when I walked away for good
cause it tore me up inside
and part of my heart died
when I tried to do
what I thought was best for you
and walked out while I thought that I still could
 

The End...

I'd rather be a sinful teardrop,
rolling down your petal,
of a rose so red
than to visit the place,
where I buried your memory
and left the flowers
that are dead
my eyes fill with tears,
as I go on to bed
knowing the end is near
there's nothing to be said
I wish somehow,there was a way
to keep you, as my friend
but as I walk to tomorrow
knowing yesterday
we both know
this is...
.........The End

bear with me ...I'm still learning site building.....

Wish I knew where this was going

Began the journey fully knowing

Hearts get broken, lives get torn

Pierced myself on a roses thorn

 Soft like petals, smells so sweet

A place to go, to hide, retreat

Lustful whispers, aching arms

Eating up the questioned charms

Wanting to be weak, to make you stronger

Wanting this moment .... a little bit longer

Escape into the dark of night

Pass on the reality fright

Why this way, why not forever

Came so close, in this endeavor

Seems to be, some ways a taunt

Was almost exactly what I want

But I'm not yours, and you're not mine

Our time is such a moralistic crime

But for a moment, the world spins round

Lost for a moment in what we found

Invisible sanctuary, that you can't see

The way your eyes look into me

Healing wounds inside my soul

Broken pieces, restored whole

 

Thank you from the past

Thank You for being a friendly face

when I came into this unfamiliar place

Thank You for dismissing the hidden dangers

and for not wanting to remain strangers

Thank You for being strong and noble

and letting yourself and soul be vulnerable

Thank You for sharing your heart and soul

and letting magic happen, then paying the toll

Thank You for loving and holding and caring

Thank You for being unafraid & daring

Thank You for feeling, and not walking away

and telling me those things, you were afraid to say

Thank You for your heart and your passion

and not leaving it part of my imagination

Thank you for not being so demanding

and hurting with me, and understanding

Thank you for being nobody else but you

even when I had to walk away, be through

Thank You for jumping with your eyes wide open

and for sharing the pain, then help coping

Thank you always till the very last day

for knowing I loved you, when I walked away

Thank You for knowing it brought me to tears

and I wish it could have lasted for years

Thank You for letting me go, without hurting more

the day when I turned and walked out the door

 

328

You came here to meet me in 328

not for a talk or a normal date

you walk right in and get to work

I love it when you're such a jerk

our bodies tangle my sweat with yours

your eyes are opening forbidden doors

you look right through my very soul

grasping at what you think, will make you whole

taking what you need, you never decieve

getting me to give, just to leave

wanting, needing  to see my jealousy

you'll never get that that out of me

I'll bend with you on every whim

just to see that smirking grin

I freely give my flesh to you

for anything you want to do

the pleasure I want, my fatal attraction

is seeing you get total satisfaction.

 

Be Free

Let me past your eyes, into your soul

the things you hide, that make you whole

staring into you, no regard for fear

cause I want to see your insides clear

At first you try to hold out on me

Afraid of what you'd let me see

I begged for you to just be true

show me everything inside of you

I offered you, my flesh and trust

we started with the sins of lust

look deep into my eyes, there is no fear

for the things about to happen dear

you plead with me don't go there, please

but my curiosity will not appease

I pushed you once, you warned me, true

I pushed again you followed through

but frightened not, am I inside

would've only hurt if you had lied

I gave blind faith and total trust

that you would give me, what you must

easily submitting to what I knew

would give me what's inside of you

my best memory now of you and me

is this time you let yourself be free

 

How did we end up here after all these years

I can't change time, these are my tears

Wasn't it just yesterday, when we were six

Playing in parks with dirty knees and sticks

 

 And somehow, Time escaped our lives

We're grown now, memories of teenage life

Choices made, that can't be un~done

Decisions from which I'd like to run

But,

I'd never run from you, never, ever

For all we've made it through, together

U R my best friend, the one that brings the light

When misery leaves me, in the dark of night

I'd never run from you, never, ever

 

Choices we made, things we do

Starting a life with somebody new

But it's just not the same, security

So much for growing up & maturity

 

Our lives are different, the things involved

It's just crazy how our lives revolved

To take us places we never dreamed of

But I never forgot about you cuz

 

I'd never run from you, never, ever

For all we've made it through, together

U R my best friend, the one that brings the light

When misery leaves me, in the dark of night

I'd never run from you, never, ever

 

We go out to share our memories of old times

Your smile still in the back of my mind

The touch of your lips, how you held me tight

Our little escape into the dark of night

 

One forbidden night that leads me to remember

 

I'd never run from you, never, ever

For all we've made it through, together

U R my best friend, the one that brings the light

When misery leaves me, in the dark of night

I'd never run from you, never, ever

 

 

 

 

Aftermath

Did you climb another rung on the ladder
That goes over my head
Did you bring your lies & deciet
With you to our bed?
You know my faith is broken
it's a total bust
Cause it was you... I was foolish
Enough to trust
I lost blind faith, you saw to that
I'm still recovering, the aftermath
Of you
So climb another rung on the ladder that
Goes over my head
Cause what we had once
Is totally dead
My faith is broken
It's a total bust
Cause it was you... I was foolish
Enough to trust
I hope your ladder reaches high
Into the sky
Cause you'll never get a chance
To tell me another lie
I lost blind faith
You saw to that
I'm still recovering, the aftermath
Of you

 

Band Aids

Held together with Band~aid smiles

laughter fake as... a glass diamond

I'm losing hope I can play the part

and I'm as critical as Simon

I set you free, not to be with me

and I've not stopped regretting it yet

so what am I to do?, I wanna be with you

my stomach is so upset

I still drive past your job,

it's been so many years

but when I think of you sometimes

it still brings me to tears

I wonder do you think of me

the way I think of you

and if I grew the guts to come to you

what is it you would do

would you flat out reject me

cause time has changed our lives

would you say what I want to hear

or hold back and tell me lies

the tie that use to bind us, tightly in my grip

has slipped away just a memory

of when it slipped off my finger tip.........

 

 

Do you get me and the words I scribble on paper

do you get that sometimes I change like the weather

do you get that sometimes I drink too much

do you get that I do it to be.... out of touch

do you get that I feel so misunderstood

do you know I'd be there if I could

do you get me when I do crazy things

do you get that my sanity hangs by strings

do you get me that I meant nothing by it

do you get that sometimes I don't fit

do you get that I feel all alone in the crowd

do you get that's why sometimes I'm loud

do you get inside this tough outside shell

there's a dark  lonely place I tend to dwell

Do you get sometimes I like to talk to strangers

Cause they don't know the hidden dangers

Do you get I'm troubled and misconstrued

and drinking makes me very rude

Do you get I'd do anything for a friend

even when they hurt me in the end

do you get that I'm way too forgiving

but I'm trying my best at this thing called living!

 

 

 

 

WHY

Why does the touch of your hands

sway my body

like the waves of an ocean?

Why does your grasp

take my breath away?

How is it you have seeped

into my tightly bound soul?

Why is it I feel your touch

healing wounds

I've never let you see

Why are you here?

Why do you bother?

What is it that brings you to me?

Are you the acceptor of

my most profound trespasses?

Is this my only chance at love?

or am I most simply lustful?

Do you even understand me?

or want to?

Wouldn't you rather be free?

I want for you to find happiness

in all you want your life to be

I just hope I'm not stopping you

by keeping you here with me

I want not to drag you

into my lonliness

or have you already been

in the company of misery?

I wish for you I'd stop wanting you

and the passion that you pull

from the depths of my soul

I wish it didn't feel so good

to live in such defiancy

take more than I've been given

not regret it, and keep on livin'

still wanting...

More time

in a day with you

no matter

what we said

We'd do!!

HeartWar

When I went against the grain for a thrill,

 & started this mess

When I knew I had feelings,

 the 3^rd time I undressed

when I realized you were all,

I desired all the time

When I couldn’t get your naked bod,

 out of my mind

When I needed you like drugs,

I fiend for your skin

The way you choked me

 and seduced me,

 and relished in our sin

the way I gave you more,

and wanted more in return

the way I knew eventually,

 the fire would burn

and burn it did spectacular,

but not without a fee

and the ones who paid the price,

 the hearts from you & me

and time went on and family,

 a husband and a child

a thought from time to time,

 when I let myself be wild

and though I walked away,

I loved you no less

but I knew you deserved,

to get out of this mess

so I freed you & as for me,

 the story didn’t end

I jumped a cliff, blindfolded,

and married my boyfriend

You never saw it coming,

it took you by surprise

I’m sorry if it hurt you,

 I was drowning in the lies

but years have passed again,

and before you I came

woke you up one morning,

to test the old flame

came with all intention,

 to totally give in

and you made it so easy,

to want to begin

you wrapped up with me,

 all clad upon the floor

I probably have never,

wanted you more

My heart is racing,

out of control

Cause I know you’re about,

 to touch my soul

I shiver in fear,

I want to give in

tears stream my face,

I can’t even grin

I can’t do this, I’m sorry,

 Have I lost my mind?

My heart is not paper,

so neatly lined

And after it all,

you surprise me once again

you say it’s ok.,

and you’ll still be my friend

I’ll never forget your touch

or how amazing you are

as I drive back home,

in my little red car

I’ll always cherish our time,

 my special friend

And I’ll probably always wish,

that it didn’t end.......

......................Street~Chalk

 

Sometimes

Sometimes there's no time

to just be me, and  breathe

Sometimes I lose my mind

 and I'm not sure I believe

Sometimes it's no time

to ask me what I think

Sometimes it's my time

to get lost in my drink!

Sometimes I wanna rewind

not play this day again

Sometimes I wanna steal this moment

and I wish it wouldn't end

sometimes I think I'm alright

right before I slip and fall

sometimes I think I really know

when I know nothing at all

sometimes you think you know me

and what makes me tick

sometimes when you're right

it's what really makes me sick!

sometimes I wanna run away

from being just me

sometimes I need a break

and my real friends can see

sometimes I fall apart

and get quiet it's true

sometimes I die inside

but I just can't show you

sometimes I am everything

you think that I'm not

sometimes I just play the role

like I have the starring part!

 

 For this moment

Thanks for coming

&  for staying  late

Thanks for another

great  escape

Thanks for the comfort

Of being my friend

Thanks for this time

I needed to mend

Thanks for not judging

And just being you

Thanks for showing me

What you could do

Thanks for the story

Of her jealousy

Thanks for coming

to tend to me

Thanks for not leaving me

All alone

Thanks for all of our talks

On the phone

Thanks for always giving me

Good advice

Though I never listen

And I pay the price

Thanks most of all

For when I'm lost & unsure

For those times you

Brought a little cure

Thanks for being there

When I made mistakes

And everything blew up

In my face

Thanks for not bailing

When I got caught

And for not being mad

Like I would've thought

Thanks for meeting me at

holiday once again....

And giving me what I needed

As a friend

 

a journey with you(D)

We walked in the forest for peice of mind, some solitude

we went far from everyone just woods for miles, not a sound

we found our place under sunny skies, amist satin floral beds

you could have heard a butterfly flutter, I only hear your breath

your eyes look into me opening the window that bears my soul

I open it freely, letting this moment absorb its place in memories

could not have been more perfect, more peaceful, more open than this

I sigh and rest with you a moment, for you took my breath away

a tear rolls down my cheek, and my heart bleeds for the words I cannot say

without a sound you tell me, not to think of when you're gone with your eyes

I touch these lips, I hold your heart,as you hold mine.

 I draw it all inside,

for one perfect sunny afternoon I smell the flowers, I see the sun,

I lock it all away inside my soul for when you're gone

 

 

 

 

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